She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
