Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
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