I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize