If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
