I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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