Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
two words: eviction party
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
