If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
then he tried to convert me to islam
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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