Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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