Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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