Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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