The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
