This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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