Whod you bang
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
