the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
