I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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