Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Blow job season was short but glorious.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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