Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
