Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
