cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
