'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize