I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
