I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
