so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Randomize
