last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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