So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize