Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
