Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
