You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
