I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
