How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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