I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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