there was a trapeze. enough said
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Randomize
