If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Fuck appropriateness.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
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