Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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