I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
