It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
