How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
