I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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