She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize