i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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