In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
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