Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
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