in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
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