This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize
