I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
