Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
