Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize