When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
