I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
