he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
My vagina just recognized that song.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Randomize
